Stress Tolerance: To Calm your Anxious Thoughts
Stress is an inevitable part of life that can stem from various sources, including work, relationships, finances, or daily activities. Although it can serve as a motivating force, excessive stress can lead to burnout. This is where stress tolerance comes into play. It refers to the ability to manage stress in a healthy and efficient way without compromising physical and mental health. Positive stress tolerance involves maintaining inner peace and avoiding feeling overwhelmed by helplessness or hopelessness. With stress tolerance, you can bounce back from stressful situations, adapt to changes, and maintain overall well-being.
Stress tolerance and resiliency are the two categories of abilities that distinguish those who thrive through adversity from those who struggle or become stagnant. Let’s look at these more closely.
Stress tolerance refers to the ability to endure and even thrive in high-pressure situations. Individuals who possess strong stress tolerance skills rise to the challenge of solving problems and adapt well to sudden changes or unexpected setbacks. They remain productive and composed even in uncertain situations and can handle their own worries while providing space for others' emotions. Often seen as a source of strength, others seek them out in times of uncertainty.
Resiliency is the ability to bounce back and maintain positivity towards oneself and others after experiencing setbacks, difficulties, or unexpected changes. People who are naturally resilient can maintain or regain their functionality and vitality despite challenges or setbacks. They are both strong and adaptable, and their positive outlook allows them to view difficulties as opportunities for growth. Rather than dwelling on disappointment, they envision the benefits that will result from the eventual attainment of their goals. They believe that their personal best is yet to come.
The properties of strength and toughness are important in material science.
Similar to people, material bodies also experience forces or loads when they are used. By drawing parallels from the field of material science, we can better understand the interaction between Stress Tolerance and Resiliency.
Diamonds are one of the strongest materials known to us, with their name derived from the Greek word adamas, meaning "invincible" or "adamant." The surface of a diamond is resistant to indentation, deformation, and wear and tear. However, despite their hardness, diamonds are brittle and can shatter when subjected to a strong impact.
This illustrates that rigid strength alone isn't sufficient to deal with stress effectively. Resilient materials can withstand impacts, bends, and twists and spring back to their original shape when unloaded. Resilience is a material's property that enables it to bear shocks and vibrations, and the greater a material's resilience, the higher its capacity to perform.
Titanium is a material known for its firmness and flexibility, making it a popular choice for aircraft wings. It is incredibly strong and durable, yet still capable of returning to its original shape after a hard impact. Similarly, individuals who are strong in Stress Tolerance must also be mindful of their limitations and avoid taking on too much. It's important to take regular breaks and release built-up stress, as excess stress can lead to negative health effects and even cause one to crack under pressure. However, Resiliency is key. Resilient individuals add flexibility to their firmness, making them less brittle and more durable. It's important to exercise caution, as highly adaptable individuals may lose touch with reality and lack a sense of urgency.
Mastering Stress: Developing Stress Tolerance and Resiliency
How can you become more resilient and develop optimal stress tolerance? Research provides powerful ways to help you become "titanium tough" in your ability to cope with life's stressors. These ways are ordered according to the PAIRIN Imperatives progression as each skill relates to stress.
The 8 Foundational Building Blocks to Individual Growth - PAIRIN
The PAIRIN Imperatives refer to eight essential characteristics that form the foundation of various aspects of life, providing us with the necessary tools and protection to navigate and cope with the world around us.
1. Emotional Self-Awareness: is the ability to recognise when you are emotionally hooked.
To be able to cope effectively, we need to be able to slow down and take a breath and get curious about what’s really going on. This requires recognising what we are thinking and feeling. For example, “I can’t stop constantly replaying the conversation in my head. “Or “I’m feeling a tightness in my stomach.” Or “I'm feeling overwhelmed by shame”, or “I feel hurt by what happened”, or “I'm resentful about the situation”, I'm feeling fearful about what's going to happen”, or “I feel lousy and drained”. It is important to recognise and differentiate your thoughts and emotions, allowing yourself to experience and process them rather than offloading them on others.
2. Self-Assessment: Be self-reflective and curious. Suspend counterfactual stories and start asking yourself honestly what the cause of your distress is, what your options are, your self-talk, what reinforcements you need or don’t need, and when to seek help.
3. Self-Alignment: Separate your identity from the cause of your temporary stress or trauma. Accept who you are at your core and evaluate how you can improve without devaluing or inflating your sense of self.
4. Self-Confidence: Build confidence in your ability to respond to stress or setback. Recall and rely on your skills, face stress head-on, and learn how to use and practice positive coping techniques. It is important to avoid unnecessary stressors, learn to adapt or alter a situation or accept what you cannot change.
5. Self-Blame: Celebrate the good more than belittling yourself. View every stressful situation as a learning opportunity and deal with the past to avoid emotional baggage. Research studies suggest that for every negative emotion we experience, we need to have at least three positive emotions that are heartfelt. One way to replenish our emotional reserves is by identifying and recording three things we are grateful for each day, particularly at night. Instead of belittling and undermining yourself, try to see every stressful situation as a chance for growth and learning.
6. Self-Restraint: Practice appropriate restraint and control. Let go of overcontrol, speak openly about pressures and failures, and refrain from impulsive reactions to stress. It is important to let go of overcontrol. Learn to take charge of your own actions and responses, not what others do and think. Don’t suppress your emotions and let them bottle up. On the flip side, don’t excessively double down and over function. Don’t avoid, numb out, or shut down and under function.
Apart from the fundamental skills mentioned above, people with high levels of Stress Tolerance and Resilience draw strength from two more crucial components.
1. Self-Care - taking care of your body is important in managing stress. Engage in physical activities that can help you release stress. It is essential to say "no" to other activities to prioritise exercise, exposure to sunlight, healthy eating habits, balanced nutrition, and adequate sleep to avoid exhaustion, wear and tear, and health problems.
2. Soul-Care involves nurturing hope and finding practices that feed your soul with love, joy, peace, compassion, and gratitude. When faced with pressure or adversity, it's important to stay hopeful and focus on what is most important to you, including your loved ones. Activities such as prayer and meditation can help cultivate hope and provide spiritual nourishment. Additionally, surrounding yourself with a small group of supportive friends and allies who know your story and will fight for your heart can provide a sense of community and support.
Bringing it altogether
Think back to a stressful situation that you handled well. As you read through the steps listed above, think about which factors you utilised to achieve success. How were you able to endure and develop from that experience?
Next, reflect on some of the significant failures or setbacks you've encountered in life. Can you recognise any differences in how you evaluated these events? What were the crucial elements that helped you recover from them?
Managing stress and adversity effectively plays a crucial role in determining our success. To achieve this, it is imperative to cultivate Stress Tolerance and Resiliency skills. Stress can serve as a positive force for growth and development if handled appropriately. Although we may encounter failures and setbacks, we should not let them discourage us from taking risks and trying new things. Instead, we can choose to strive for Resiliency and develop Stress Tolerance and adaptability to attain a "titanium tough" quality.